Do you ever feel like you’ve forgotten who you are? I mean, you still know you name but you don’t really remember other key things about yourself? Like your favorite hiking trail or what music you like. This phenomenon is fairly common in moms. You might not even realize you suffer from “forgetting yourself” syndrome — until, that is, you realize all your radio presets are for stations that play Selena Gomez and Justin Timberlake (Wait, I thought I liked Dave Grohl and the Dead…). 

If you’re a mom, forgetting yourself starts when your kids are little. When surviving until bedtime can seem like a monumental feat, finding time to take a shower (take a shower!) feels like the height of self-indulgence, and lying on the couch with a novel or shopping for something besides diapers and groceries are almost unheard of. And that’s generally a good thing, assuming you want your babies to survive.

As my kids have grown, I’ve made more and more time for myself — to hike, drink wine, discuss books, even to sit by the pool instead of getting in the pool. But taking time for yourself and really remembering your real, true self are two different things. I may make time for the gym, but when’s the last time I did a week-long backpacking trip with a friend? Or ate a pile of roasted veggies for dinner because that’s what I want? Oh yeah, never.

Did you know that before I was a mom, I was an editor at a ski magazine and traveled to Europe, Canada, and Japan in search of great snow and interesting stories? I also worked really long hours on issue closings, became quite the stickler for good grammar, and was known on occasion to go into battle against an art director over making space for a single, crucial, word. I probably could be all that still. But, amid the sleep deprivation, worry, and nagging, I guess I forgot to be.

Then, this past weekend I got together with some old friends from my pre-kid life. And, after talking so much we almost never made dinner, laughing to tears over old stories and funny quirks — of ours and others — (and, yes, good ol’ grammar jokes), and then seeking out untracked snow and steeps on a bluebird day with no stops for chicken fingers or waiting for kids who forgot their gloves, I remembered myself. Oh right, this is what I’m like. This is me. 

It’s nice to be reminded, and I just wanted to thank my old friends for that.

So, if you ever notice you’re forgetting yourself, I’ve decided the best cure is to reconnect with old friends — friends who knew you when you were, maybe, a little more you. (Which is not to discount my new friends at all; these are the women who keep me sane 99 percent of the time and whom I love to tears.)

And (wait for it…here comes the somewhat awkward segue to a recipe, which I’m starting to think is my trademark) if any of your friends (old or new) are gluten free, paleo, or lactose intolerant, you can make this killer Pad Thai for them. Which is what I did — because that’s who I am now.

Paleo Pad Thai with Shrimp & Chicken
Ingredients
1 spaghetti squash
1-2 zucchini (optional)
2 tbs. coconut oil, melted (or olive oil)
1 lb. raw shrimp, peeled and deveined
1 lb. chicken breast, cut into bite-sized pieces
2 shallots, minced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp. fresh ginger, minced or grated
3 cups bean sprouts
1 cup carrots, julienned or cut into matchsticks
2 eggs, lightly beaten
2 green onions, sliced

Dressing:
Juice of 1 lime
2 tbs. fish sauce or coconut aminos (if you’re not avoiding soy, use soy sauce or tamari)
2 tbs. honey (optional)
1 tbs. chili sauce (optional)
2 tbs. almond butter
1/4 cup fresh cilantro, chopped
Sea salt & pepper

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Place the spaghetti squash in oven and roast for about 1 hr. When cool enough the handle, cut in half, remove the seeds with a spoon, and use a fork to scrape out the spaghetti squash “noodles.” Spiralize the zucchini if using (i.e. cut into “zoodles” with your spiralizer). My spaghetti squash was huge, so I only used half of it in this recipe, and it easily fed five grown, hungry women. In a small saucepan over low heat, combine the lime juice, fish sauce/coconut aminos, honey, chili sauce, and almond butter, and stir until smooth then turn off the heat (if the sauce seems too thick, you can add a little water to it.) Melt 1 tbs. coconut oil over medium-high heat in a large skillet. Add the chicken pieces and stir-fry until cooked through (approx. 6-8 min.) and set aside. Add shrimp, cook for 3–4 min. until opaque, and set aside. Put another 1 tbs. coconut oil in the skillet, add the the shallots and carrots, and sauté for two mins. Add the garlic, ginger, and bean sprouts, and cook for another minute. Pour the eggs into the center of the skillet, scramble, and combine with the vegetables. Add in the squash noodles, dressing, green onions, and protein. Toss everything together, season with salt & pepper to taste, and garnish with lots of cilantro. Serve with hot sauce.

 

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